Author: admin Created: 10/9/2009 5:28 AM
Stuff Happens. Accepting it is the key to happiness.

Without exception, “Bad News” is defined as ‘something unexpected’.

The power of “Acceptance” (this requires humility), is that once I ‘accept the situation’, I can move this situation from “Bad News” to “undesirable developments”.

This is an important distinction in relation to fear and possible feelings of hopelessness and depression.

Again, without exception, fear is always: ‘what I want or expect wont happen’ or ‘not being able to control my future’. For example, I expect that I should be ‘treated fairly’ and I fear that ‘it wont happen’ or that I cannot ‘make it happen’. So, when I am ‘not treated fairly’, I consider it “Bad News”.

However, I always have the option to not hold this expectation.

Therefore, I do not need to fear this situation.

It occurred to me that at the core of all depression is fear. This is not that surprising, but, what may be surprising is to realize that this fear is always one thing: the fear of not being able to control the future.

I can think of no exception to this.

When this feeling becomes all consuming, blocking out the other parts of life, and affecting all perspective, it becomes depression.

Because, acceptance transcends fear. When we relinquish trying to control the future, and accept what may (or may not) happen, we no longer have to fear it. Bad things happen to us all the time, it is only the things that we resist, because we want to control, that we fear. But, it is not the thing that we fear, it is the chance that we may not be able to control the situation that is the core of our fear.

No Control Anyway However, I realize that I do not have control anyway. Anytime I do not have acceptance, I am just being resistant. I am being immature, and I am not being humble.

The blessing...

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After months of meditating on it, I have concluded that fear will never go away. It will always show up, somehow.

Fear is an emotion, and like all emotions it passes. The challenge is to not make decisions based on these fears because these decisions are usually unwise and are only explainable if “I did it because I was afraid” is used as a justification.

The thing we fear the most is anything that threatens our ego. Our ego is our sense of ourselves. We fear anything that threatens this, because if we lose our sense of ourselves, what remains?

The solution to this dilemma is to practice humility. Humility is a “…modest opinion or estimate of one's own importance”. If we do not resist the truth of who we actually are, we don’t need to fight to constantly defend it. We don’t have to fear what we accept.

Acceptance In All Things In regards to all fears other than fears directly related to ego (however, the underlying...

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Some say that courage is being scared but doing the correct thing anyway. So perhaps it is safe to say that courage is walking through fear.

What is fear? Most would say “I know it when I see it”.

I would say that I always experience the emotion of fear when I am being resistant to some outcome. I am not accepting that this outcome may happen. This could be a fear of something as major as a cancer diagnosis, or the fear that someone will cut in front of me in line and I will be delayed an additional five minutes.

Therefore, I always have  a solution, that is of Acceptance.

Acceptance is very powerful. Even for the non-believer it can be a Higher Power. Yes, it is practically impossible to do, but to Accept all things at all times, is to humble oneself, and to surrender to a power greater than oneself. What I receive from this submission is a tool that allows me to overcome any fear:

I can accept that negative emotions will come (and be grateful that all emotions pass...

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I am not accepting something that is why I am not at peace and suffering.
I am attached to something.
I am in some way, not humble, this is why I cannot accept something. I feel I deserve something or something to happen the way I want.
I have a choice, I can be more humble, and decide I do not deserve something or something to happen the way I want. 
It is my ego that tells me what I deserve.
What is my ego anyway? It is simply how I see myself.

I am constantly trying to get the real world to match up to my ego.
My greatest fear is anything that threatens my ego.
This is the core of all my fears.

Humility is the key that opens this door to freedom.

This moment is as good as I will allow it to be. However, attachments block me from this moment with their expectations…

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If we look deeply and honesty we will find that our fears are based on some potential loss of ego or pride. This is easily rectified by being more humble. That presentation that must, in our minds, go perfectly, causes fear and anxiety because we believe that we really are perfect. That we are better than our fellows.

Recognizing the fact that we are not better than our fellows and that our purpose in life is to be a worker among workers, to truly be humble, removes the core of our fears.

“I am not much but I am all I think about.”

Our view of ourselves is our Ego. It is how we define ourselves in the world. It is composed of our beliefs. This can be positive or negative. I can see myself as important or as nothing. Those seeking spirituality learn to recognize that in fact we are all just a part of the entire universe. When we see ourselves as anything more (or less) than that, it is our Ego telling us something that is artificial and not true. We can actually change it by changing our beliefs.   Fear requires the Ego. It is what sees our “problems” as being the most important thing in the world. We believe that if this project at work is not completed on time, all hope in the entire world is lost. It is the Ego that inflates our importance in the universe and the importance of whatever problem we may be experiencing (or think we will experience when projecting into the future).

All fear, even the fear of death, can be altered by altering our beliefs about our position in the...

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Several times a day I say to myself:

“This moment is a Blessing”

No other moment, not the future or the past, but ‘this’ moment

It is not that there are no problems (all my problems are in the future), but that this moment is actually a good thing, a blessing because I am alive, and right now I ask for nothing more

I can only enjoy something if I am grateful for it, so I am grateful for my life… my life right now. I may have a terminal illness but right now, this moment I am alive, it is that I am grateful for. Anything I am grateful for is a blessing to me.

When I see this moment as wonderful (see what I did there, I added ‘wonderful’ because ‘blessings’ are such a good thing) I don’t want, this moment, to be spoiled with Fear or Anger

When I make decisions, in this moment, without Fear or Anger, I make decisions that are very different than I would otherwise

I am able to feel Peace

I am...

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We go through the day and try to order everything in our minds:

My boss will do this and say this

My co-workers will do this and say this

This will happen when I go to the store

The washing machine will do this

When things don’t happen as we expect, our lack of acceptance causes stress. Even worse we imagine what would happen when things don‘t go our way, and the stress we feel is as bad as if it were actually happening.

There is no end to the anxiety, fear, and stress we can build up from this.

Instead we can refuse to figure things out. Recognize and accept the true chaos of life.

Yet, we resist this suggestion.

We feel these things we want we should have, we deserve.  We don’t care that the driver next to us should be allowed to go in front of us, they better not cut in front of us on the freeway. No one should get anything from me, better than me, disagree with me, especially when I have, in my mind,...

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