The Solution To Freedom From Fear
Chapter Five, in the book, Alcoholics Anonymous, talks of our fear. it controls our lives. It is the motivation for practically everything we do. We become angry when we feel threatened. Our fear is always that we will lose something. A possession, a status, an affection, security. Resentments are nothing more than continued anger at someone who we fear will take one of these things from us. At the core of this is self-centeredness. Basically, we are concerned with satisfying our own needs and wants. This wouldn’t be so bad if we could actually satisfy ourselves. But, in truth, as soon as we satisfy one ‘want’ or ‘need’, it is quickly replaced with another.
The solution is to not be self-centered. To instead, be motivated by helping others. It doesn’t matter who, just anyone but ourselves. This removes the fear of any “loss”, and since “loss of something” is the only thing we ever fear, it removes all fear.
It is our motivations that we need change. If we help the needy because we want to raise our status with the local charity organization, we can become angry if the needy people do not improve to our expectations. If instead we are motivated by simply helping others, we can see, and appreciate, any positive impact in their lives. We can also see when we cause harm and pull away if needed.
We are able to avoid a ‘feeling of loss’, if we never drive a ‘stake in the ground of expectation’. Self-centered-ness plants emotional demands and expectation on every situation. Motivation in only helping others, does not allow us to do that.